The Ultimate Urban Myth...

From: Louis Jones

> I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
> having been served a rat in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. So
> anyway, one day he went to sleep and when he awoke he was in his
> bathtub and it was full of ice and he was sore all over. When he got
> out of the tub he realized that HIS KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN and he saw
> a note on his mirror that said "Call 911!" But he was afraid to use
> his phone because it was connected to his computer, and there was a
> virus on his computer that would destroy his hard drive if he opened
> an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"
>
> He knew it wasn't a hoax because he himself was a computer programmer
> who was working on software to save us from Armageddon when the year
> 2000 rolls around. His program will prevent a global disaster in
> which all the computers get together and distribute the $600 Neiman
> Marcus cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates. (It's true -
> I read it all last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES HIMSELF, who
> was also promising me a free Disneyworld vacation and $5,000 if I
> would forward the e-mail to everyone I know.)
>
> The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to report his
> missing kidneys, but reaching into the coin-return slot he got jabbed
> with an HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that
> said, "Welcome to the world of AIDS."
>
> Luckily he was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one, actually,
> where that little boy who is dying of cancer is, the one whose last
> wish is for everyone in the world to send him an e-mail and the
> American Cancer Society has agreed to pay him a nickel for every
> e-mail he receives. I sent him two e-mails and one of them was a
> bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get it and
> forward it to twenty people you will have good luck, but if you 
> forward it to ten people you will only have ok luck, and if you send
> it to less than ten people you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).
>
> So anyway the poor guy tried to drive himself to the hospital, but on
> the way he noticed another car driving along without his lights on.
> To be helpful, he flashed his lights at him and was promptly shot as
> part of a gang initiation.
>
> And it's a little-known fact that the Y1K problem caused the Dark Ages.